5 Instant Ways To Build Attraction

6 min readApr 5, 2022

Many people like to fly blind when it comes to building attraction. Then there are the dating life “purists” who attest that they need things to be organic. I actually believe you can do both. I think you can learn the very basics of what builds attraction and then blend that with your natural personality. The two blended can be an incredible one-two punch and something that everyone should consider adding to their dating arsenal.

I promise you that if you can start by mastering these skills in these five steps, you will notice a change in your dating and romantic life. But you’ve got to start using them today!

1. Say their name

A lot more than a Destiny’s Child song. Saying someone's name in reference to something or in conversation is a huge attraction builder.

Confused?

Think about a time someone on a date has said your name a few times? How did it make you feel? Ya, see? Saying someone's name says a lot about your personality. It says you’re considerate and have small attention to detail that makes the person feel included in your life. Even if it’s the space of a one-hour date. It show’s that you’re a good listener and it show’s that your interested. Saying someone’s name immediately opens them up to falling into actively listening to you. When you say someone’s name on a first date, they’ll remember how they felt when you said it. There are so many people who go on first dates and still do not feel seen. Saying someone’s name gives them a powerful indicator of acknowledgment. Saying someone’s name on a first date means you’re confirming decades' worth of identity and personality building. It seems like such a small thing but it’s very effective.

A person’s name is to him or her the sweetest and most important sound in any language.” — Dale Carnegie.

Try this. Whenever you go out with friends, spend time with family or a group of people. Listen carefully to the person who addresses everyone by their name. How are they perceived? How do they interact with the group? Guarantee you this person is one of the most charming in the room.